A Rager

I'm flying out to Texas in the morning. Dorothy passed away on Monday and it's okay. Actually, it's better than okay, it's good. Of course, she will be missed and thought of, and hopefully, through lots of stories, my children and my children's children will come to know and love this lady like I do. She's irresistible.

As I mentioned before, she loved flowers, plants, anything alive...animals (in fact, she was nicknamed "Dogorthy Cherdogsky"--yes, it's true)...you name it. So, my lovely sister, Adrienne, will be singing "Consider the Lilies" at her funeral. I've listened to the song all week. My kiddies keep saying, "Why are we listening to this? It's not even Sunday." I know my dears, but it's so beautiful and it reminds me of her.

So, in her honor, I had to post this first picture of the two of us in Italy. She took me there right before I was married. I love this picture...it speaks volumes. First of all, I'd like for you to notice the massive 5,000 lb. bag I'm carrying. This was her "purse." Frankly, I have no idea what she carried in there (a small person could have possibly fit), all I saw was hot pink/red lipstick, kleenex, and a nail file come out. I never did figure out what was so heavy. But, she carried her "purse" everywhere. Also, take a close look at that hat she's wearing. I have many beautiful pictures of our trip to Italy, but I had to have this one on here. We were in Pompeii and it was so bright and hot that she insisted on getting some shade. The only thing she could find was an Italian vendor selling baseball caps with sports cars on the fronts. So she wouldn't miss too much of the tour (so like her), she quickly grabbed the red one to match her outfit...never mind that it had a hot red Ferrari on the front. I couldn't stop laughing. Even to this day, it makes me laugh.

The second picture is of Papa and Dorothy with Annie when we lived in Santa Barbara...very sweet and very like them.

In hearing me describe Dorothy, our dear friend Adam B. replied, "The party that awaits her on the other side...I bet it's a rager." Yes, a rager indeed.

Dorothy

October is such a delicious month, don't you think? It is full of my favorite sights, flavors, and smells. I love it for many reasons, but a couple of them in particular. My baby baby Erika lou-lou was born , nearly a year ago this month (sheesh, where does the time go?!) and her namesake was also born this month, only 93 years earlier...Dorothy Louise.

Dorothy is my grandmother, and I wrote about my last visit with her down in Texas last December. I love Dorothy...everyone does that knows her. She is THE poster girl for a positive attitude and a par-ty animal. She's like a lightbulb that can brighten even the dullest of days with her twinkly eyes and smiley, dimpled, wrinkled cheeks. I had the incredibly good fortune of living in the same town (a rather large one) as my grandparents, Papa and Dorothy. Papa and Dorothy have always been such a huge part of my life...and all of their grandchildren's. It's evident in the fact that almost all of her grandchildren flew in from the four corners of the earth to celebrate her 94th birthday.

She can't sing "Once der was a pretty little girl and her name was a Alecus Rumsey," take care of all the flowers and plants in her yard and her neighbors', she can't volunteer at M.D. Andersen Hospital like she did for about 40 years, she can't play bridge, speed, or dominoes and beat her daughters and grandchildren like she always did, she can't travel like she always loved, she can't tell you a story about her growing up days in Luling, TX or West Columbia, TX, she can't cook her famous chocolate pie that still lives on in all of our Thanksgivings...but, she can still sing the University of Texas fight song, "The Eyes of Texas."

I'm sorry this post is a little disjointed. It's after 11 p.m. and my brain is short-circuiting. Two weekends ago, we all flew to Houston, Texas to see my grandma, Dorothy. She had a stroke about a month ago, so she can't talk anymore, she only mumbles and sings the UT fight song (totally cracked us up--she's a UT alumni and has always been a fan). It just about tore all of our hearts up to see her in a nursing home, in hospice. She would try to communicate, but it only came out in mumbles. Several times, she would just stop mid-mumble, look and smile at us, and then just wink. She knew we couldn't understand her mumbo-jumbo, but we could understand her smile.

I'll never forget that weekend. My children will never forget that weekend. Our hearts were full of happiness and love for this dear woman who has been a ray of sunshine in all of our lives. I think about her everyday. If she were more alert I would tell her this story and she would laugh(I'll tell you instead). Today, my Joseph kept getting into my Costco-size Nestle chocolate chip bag. I kept telling him, "Joseph, get outta that bag!" Finally, in a last-ditch effort for one more handful, he exclaimed, "But Mom, little boys LOVE chocolate chips!"

Love you Dorothy. Hope you had a very Happy Birthyday!

(And a huge thank you to my dynamo sister-in-law, Natalie, for scanning that second picture for me, as she was two days away from moving...thank you Nat. loves to you)

weekend

From the very beginning of our marriage, Adam and I have referred to Thursday evening as "Christmas eve"...we like Fridays just that much. We cherish our weekends; however, usually we have back to back activities...like most of you I suspect. I love empty calendar weekends. The kind that you can do whatever whenever--blissful.

Even though this weekend wasn't empty, it is still one of my favorites. It's conference weekend! We've got the cinnamon rolls ready to be baked in the morning, so we can all sit, take notes, and be fed...in every way. I look forward to this for a good six months.

This week, by chance, Adam and I came upon some good parenting tips from a lecture we watched on BYU TV. They were so good that I thought I'd share. Maybe it could help?

(They now have a permanent place on my bedside table...so they can sink in better).

So, the speaker talked about how important it is to balance rules/consequences and nurturing in our families. We need a healthy balance of both. As most of us have a good rule system in our homes, it is important to know how to nurture our children. He gave 4 suggestions to better-nurturing:

1) Give your children words of affirmation, appreciation, and approval. Tell them, regularly, what a good job they did on xyz. For example, even if you've told them a million times to empty the trash, just take their hand and escort them to finally emptying the trash. When they do (even though you practically did it yourself), say, "Good job! Thanks for emptying the trash!"

2) Create a positive environment in your home at these 3 critical times in the day, the crossroad times: in the morning, when they get home from school, and when they go to bed. Instead of a "Get up!" in the morning, replace it with "Good Morning!"

3) Spend time together as a family

4) Give your children physical contact. It's so important...especially at those 3 times. Hug, kiss, pat them on the back. They did a study that waitresses who had even the slightest contact with customers were given more in tips. We all need a good hug!

So, that's it. Simple. Sweet. Helpful (at least for me).

Today, I found a cute little Jack-in-the-Box toy at the thrift store. Instead of a 'Jack' it's a bunny rabbit inside. Joseph, looking for the toy said, "Hey mom! Where's the 'Bunny-Get-Outta-There toy?" When I started giggling, he added, "I mean, the 'Bunny-Box' toy." I giggled even harder.

Extraordinary in the Ordinary

"That's it!! No more craziness. No more late, late nights. I am producing a schedule that I will adhere to every day of my life. I am taking control!"

These were my thoughts about a week ago. I'll be honest, when everyone was getting their gifts in heaven, I did not get into the Will-Be-Organized line. Instead, I was probably off in some corner talking and laughing. dang!

So, here I am, always trying to make some sort of order out of chaos. I wrote the new schedule in my journal. Schedules stress me out. So, three days into it, I sat on my bed in tears, trying to explain my situation to my husband (while he was holding his iphone/planner in his hand, mind you. He was a good one and stood in the will-be-organized line).

"I feel like I'm in a box and I'm about to explode! I want to do something crazy like...like...paint a wall purple!"

"Purple?"

"Or maybe hang some lime-green beads in a doorway!"

"Hmm."

"Alright, I'll just go to bed."

Life can be very ordinary...same, same, same. But, while trying to get a little bit of order, I can find the extraordinary--like Joseph learning how to ride a bike this week! Extraordinary! Or getting candy bars, all around, at Target for 100% Spelling Tests. Extraordinary! Or writing in my journal everyday this week (thank you very much). Majorly extraordinary!!!

Hope you can find some extraordinary in the ordinary...it's just so much more delightful!

real life

My day started really great. And then daily life just settled in. By the time the afternoon hit, the wheels were comin' off the cart. Homework wasn't getting done, piano wasn't getting practiced, shin guards couldn't be found, and my kitchen looked like a peanut butter & jelly bomb went off.

As I ran into Albertson's this evening to grab poppy seeds and frozen pizza, I looked down at my navy blue top. All I could see was a nice big banana shmear all over the front of me. I'm so classy. At least my shirt wasn't white!!

Craving Beauty

Meet Victoria, my new friend. I have driven by her house a hundred times, but it wasn't until last week that I finally noticed her garden. It took me back by surprise, the roses, the freesia, the daisies...I just couldn't believe my eyes! After turning around to admire the beauty again (and again and again), I decided to just go up to the door and tell the person so. Victoria answered her door and after me explaining that I just LOVED her roses (and also explaining that I wasn't a complete weirdo...maybe just a little one), she proceeded to explain and teach to me, in broken english, about each rose, its name, and how to care for it (by the way, did you know that if you plant a banana peel, all cut up, in the ground by the roses' roots it will be more fragrant?). I came back a couple days later with a notebook to take scrupulous notes. She's coming over in January to help me plant my roses. I can hardly wait! I felt so happy and uplifted. Why? I think our spirits crave beauty...and not the beauty offered at the MAK counter (although they have really great lipstick). This kind of beauty is created by God...the master creator. After admiring a pink sunset, a starry night, falling rain, sparkly eyes, a bright smile, a soft touch, a velvety rose we are uplifted and happy...the kind that lasts.


Anyways, let me step down from my soap box. I solved my no-window-in-the-laundryroom dilemna. I've been doing my laundry...outside. My dryer is busted, so my boys and I configured a new way (after spending time at the laundromat last week). I love my new way.

School is in session, AND I pulled them out to go to Disneyland with Adam's brother Peter and family. All had a great time. I didn't feel any guilt until yesterday Annie told me how lousy she did on her Science test "because we were gone when she announced it". Ah well.

Gotta run and wake everyone up for school. Now go and have yourself one beautiful day!!

One of the illusions of life is that the present hour is not the critical decisive hour. Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year. He only is right who owns the day, and no one owns the day who allows it to be invaded by worry, fret, and anxiety. Finish every day, and be done with it. You have done what you could.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

(Did you notice, A? Emerson.)

pouring rain

When it rains, it pours...

MAMA MIA (said with feeling)!!!

I used to like the little show, Ratatouille. Not so much anymore. In fact, it will be a good long while until it is popped in the DVD player at this house. (I hope none of you are eating, while reading here). We have had a serious mice issue. Did you know the food of choice nowadays for mice is peanut butter and cheese fishy crackers? Okay, I'll stop. Just be grateful you aren't developing a relationship with mice snappers and DCON...like my husband.

And speaking of husband, my poor husband. We were in the ER last night...kidney stones. I've only seen him in this kind of writhing pain once before in our marriage, 11 years ago...kidney stones. I love taking care of him. I know having a husband as a hospital administrator doesn't offer perks like an all-expense paid, luxurious business trip or early evening arrivals from work; however, it does offer one very wonderful, very important perk. As I was driving him to his hospital last night, he picked up his phone and called the dr. on-call. He told him he was coming. We went through the back door, walked right in the room, and he was hooked up to pain meds in 10 minutes flat. We were in and out of there in an hour and 15 minutes. I need to remind myself of this perk, especially when it feels like I haven't seen my hard-working husband for days. A urologist friend called today to check on him. I could hear the dr. trying to convince Adam to come in for a CT scan. Adam said (while wincing in pain), "Oh, I'll be okay." Then I heard, "Okay Adam...good talking with you. Now, let me talk with your wife." Needless to say, he went in for a CT scan. He's sleeping right now.

California has fires. more fires. fires=Savannah's asthma flare-up

My grandma-Dorothy had a stroke last week. She's still in the hospital. I've been thinking a lot about her and her frustration in not being able to talk. I'm sad of that. But, the Lord is mindful. He always is. I have faith in that.

BUT, the silver lining is (and there always is one)...I have such supportive family and supportive friends. Friends that take my kiddies when I need to run off to the hospital. Friends that feed my kiddies. Family that calls. Family and friends that pray.

Life is busy. Life is good. With every shower, brings lovely flowers. I'm counting on it. (I'm almost finished with my laundry...a definite flower).